I'm angry because I think you were being selfish. Not that you give a shit. You're very worldly and all above me and have lived for a fucking bazillion years, I get it.
I'm angry because I hate destiny and fate and all that bullshit. I'm angry because you're just - one more fucking girl I couldn't do anything for.
Does it really fucking matter if you are selfish or you're acting selfish? It comes down to the same thing, Brilith. Splitting hairs like that doesn't fucking matter.
[ she folds her arms. ] You wanna know something? For all as much as I went on about you being noble and self-sacrificial - those aren't compliments. Not from me. I wasn't trying to butter you up - you're way more fucking interesting to me if you're fucked up.
I'm not going to take it on myself. But I am annoyed, because I thought that maybe there was something else there, and there wasn't. I'm just digging a hole and finding mud.
It's fine. You're not the first and you won't be the last.
[ a beat. ] You should probably listen to the people who love you, here. They're gonna break themselves in half to try and make you whole, and I'm gonna pick up the pieces. Like always.
What's done is done. I can't change who I am for their sake, and I have no desire to. But you can't pretend to know exactly what's happened between myself and any of the others where you can't see, either.
I like you, Beauregard. You remind me of... [ ...it doesn't matter who, so she shakes her head. ] I don't want to keep arguing with you.
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I'm angry because I hate destiny and fate and all that bullshit. I'm angry because you're just - one more fucking girl I couldn't do anything for.
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[ said softly, with no heat behind it. brilith knows she isn't as good a person as they all believe. she knows. it doesn't change much.
that said... she does laugh quietly, mirthlessly. ]
Then that makes two of us. Just do me a favor, and don't take it on yourself. The fault lies with no one but Agni and myself.
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[ she folds her arms. ] You wanna know something? For all as much as I went on about you being noble and self-sacrificial - those aren't compliments. Not from me. I wasn't trying to butter you up - you're way more fucking interesting to me if you're fucked up.
I'm not going to take it on myself. But I am annoyed, because I thought that maybe there was something else there, and there wasn't. I'm just digging a hole and finding mud.
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[ she's quiet for a moment, apparently considering all of this, and then: ]
I'm sorry to disappoint.
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[ a beat. ] You should probably listen to the people who love you, here. They're gonna break themselves in half to try and make you whole, and I'm gonna pick up the pieces. Like always.
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I won't hurt them. So you can save any further lectures for someone else.
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You won't hurt them? Really? I fucking doubt that. Maybe not on purpose, but the way you're acting is going to upset people. Already has.
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I like you, Beauregard. You remind me of... [ ...it doesn't matter who, so she shakes her head. ] I don't want to keep arguing with you.
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Fine. Then I guess we're done here. [ and without another word, she opens the door and walks out. ]