He is the reason this keeps happening - the reason I keep being reborn even though he knows it isn't what I want. If he would just let go of me, I would finally be allowed to die for good. Even if that means my soul would be dragged into hell, I wouldn't have to live another cursed life.
[He doesn't know what to make of that. It does sound wrong, maybe. But he also knows he'd hold onto someone he loved for as long as he could, too.]
It seems like the people who died here turned into ghosts. And they're just all hanging out as ghosts playing M*rio and talking to us on the ouija board. So if you wanna die so you can lose these memories, I think you're out of luck.
[That's what he thought she'd say. She's still Brilith, no matter what she says. She still cares what happens to them.]
Okay. Then I think you're gonna be around for a bit. I don't think anybody's gonna vote for you, especially when we have to keep catching these monsters.
That's fine. I've found plenty of ways to end my own life before, and this place has given us many options for that. I shouldn't have to rely on the vote.
Don't try to die yet. Stay and help us. Help us catch the monsters, and help us find out why they're becoming monsters, and help us go home. Every single person who can help with that counts, but especially you, Brilith. You're smart and you care and people care about you. There's a lot that you can do for everybody while you're here.
[He looks at her very seriously, jaw hard.]
If you do that then I promise - if we're ever in a situation again like with Asch, where time's up and we don't know who to pick, then I'll vote for you. And I'll tell everyone else to vote for you, too.
They care about the Brilith I was before, not the Brilith I am now.
[ but she's said this already, and galo refused to listen. to him, she is still the same woman, albeit with more anger and sadness in her soul than she could have imagined before. ]
That's no guarantee. I could easily take myself out of the picture without relying on your vote. Why should I wait and rely on a chance?
Because you wanted a way to do it without hurting people. But whoever is turning us into monsters is picking us off one by one. Plus the announcements each week, telling us to kill even more of us, and the dangerous stuff in those rooms - isn't it obvious somebody is trying to thin our numbers?
If you die outside of the voting and trials, you're helping them do that. You're helping them kill us, and win.
You think that won't hurt people, too? What about Isaac, who has already lost someone he cared for in that same way? What about the guilt complexes of everyone here?
It matters because I don't plan on there ever being a situation like Asch again! But if I fail at that, then you win. Better to sacrifice somebody who doesn't care, right?
[ and yet... the words of others who have been to visit her, to beg for much the same as galo, echo in her mind, and it turns her knuckles white. the brilith that this body belongs to... she still cares. she's still there, even as she drowns under the weight of all her other lives. it should be an easier to decision to make, she thinks.
and yet. ]
You all keep asking me to stay, and you have no idea what it means for me to live with this.
[ she's hardly convinced, and perhaps that shows on her face. by all means, she should tell him to leave, to forget her. a woman as cold and bitter as she is will hardly be worth his time. ]
You should focus more on those who wish to live, Galo. [ her voice is soft, and resigned. ] Let me be clear. There are others who have already begged for me to stay, others who rely on her far more than you. They are the reason I will accept this deal of yours.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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No one simply moves on when they're tethered to someone like him. I never even had a chance.
[ they are
possibly not talking about the same thing ]
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When you say you're tethered to him, what does that mean?
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...But he will never do that.
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[He doesn't know what to make of that. It does sound wrong, maybe. But he also knows he'd hold onto someone he loved for as long as he could, too.]
It seems like the people who died here turned into ghosts. And they're just all hanging out as ghosts playing M*rio and talking to us on the ouija board. So if you wanna die so you can lose these memories, I think you're out of luck.
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[ everyone seems so intent on lecturing her... ]
Still. If this place would free me from the cycle, from Agni, then perhaps that wouldn't be so terrible.
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You don't care what happens here, so it shouldn't be an issue.
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I have no desire to harm anyone just to get what I want. Least of all if it means dragging Agni into this world's afterlife with me.
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Okay. Then I think you're gonna be around for a bit. I don't think anybody's gonna vote for you, especially when we have to keep catching these monsters.
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What if I made a deal with you?
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[He looks at her very seriously, jaw hard.]
If you do that then I promise - if we're ever in a situation again like with Asch, where time's up and we don't know who to pick, then I'll vote for you. And I'll tell everyone else to vote for you, too.
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[ but she's said this already, and galo refused to listen. to him, she is still the same woman, albeit with more anger and sadness in her soul than she could have imagined before. ]
That's no guarantee. I could easily take myself out of the picture without relying on your vote. Why should I wait and rely on a chance?
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If you die outside of the voting and trials, you're helping them do that. You're helping them kill us, and win.
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Does it really matter how it happens, in the end?
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[ and yet... the words of others who have been to visit her, to beg for much the same as galo, echo in her mind, and it turns her knuckles white. the brilith that this body belongs to... she still cares. she's still there, even as she drowns under the weight of all her other lives. it should be an easier to decision to make, she thinks.
and yet. ]
You all keep asking me to stay, and you have no idea what it means for me to live with this.
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[He's just going to trust her, and he's going to accept he doesn't understand, but he's going to try.]
Do we have a deal?
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You should focus more on those who wish to live, Galo. [ her voice is soft, and resigned. ] Let me be clear. There are others who have already begged for me to stay, others who rely on her far more than you. They are the reason I will accept this deal of yours.
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[He doesn't need her to live for him. He just needs her to live.]
I have enough energy to focus on everybody, you included. So you're just going to have to get used to that.
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Are you done here?
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[Getting up! He'll focus his energy wherever he wants, you're not the god damn energy cops!!]